I have many overwhelmed male friends. Strong Women They are educated, take care of themselves, develop all the time, and their earnings range from PLN 10,000 to 100,000+ per month. Normal, cool, above average guys.
I am also at such an age that there are almost no singles among them. If they are in successful relationships, their partners are regularly women who are also educated, resourceful and know what they want. Some have slightly different tastes and associate with women who look good but are unable to keep up with them. These relationships are not that durable anymore (some divorces have already been seen), and even if they are, they are not successful – they are dominated by a feeling of alienation and a DilMil.co lack of deep understanding.
In general, it could be treated as anecdotal evidence from the series “I know a guy who knows a guy for whom it works”. Only that behind this observation is also a series of reliable studies that regularly prove that we bond with people similar to us. There are exceptions, but statistically cool women are cool guys. Enterprising guys value enterprising women. Resourcefulness attracts resourcefulness.
Cultural anthropologists and evolutionary biologists know this, but there are still plenty of women who believe that the world works differently and that their strength or intelligence is a problem.
If you are one of them, then you most likely do not understand two phenomena.
1. You take the wrong definition of a “strong woman”
The language is difficult. When you use most words, they can have a different shade depending on the context or who is saying them. For example, such a word “nice.” Apparently obvious, but you don’t know if it’s about someone being well-mannered, polite and saying “Good morning” to all neighbors or not being able to say “No” and agreeing all their life to things they don’t want.
It’s the same with the phrase “strong woman” because you may understand it differently than guys, so let me tell you what it looks like from our perspective.
According to men, how do strong women behave?
- They are resourceful
- Know where they are going
- They solve their problems
- They are aware of their worth
- Clearly communicate their needs
- They have no problem showing respect and closeness to others
- Their repertoire includes not only strength, but also equality and tenderness
How do strong women NOT behave?
- They raise their noses
- Look down on others
- They believe that they need to be applied for
- They are unavailable
- Have trouble showing affection
- They exude the approach of “I don’t need you for anything”
- Believe that “strength” is the only quality that should matter
If you put these two pictures together, you’ll see what the problem is. The force I am writing about on the blog concerns the broadly understood coping with one’s own life. DilMil Meanwhile, many women simply confuse being strong with being cold, unapproachable, and unfriendly.
If a guy meets a successful woman who can be caring and makes him feel important to her, she will go mad with happiness. No wonder, because you also want to be with a guy who acts like a confident conqueror, and at the same time can be affectionate and supportive to you.
However, do you know who wants to be in a relationship with a person who considers himself better than others, cannot open up to anything and looks down on others?
And it doesn’t really matter if such features are displayed by a man or a woman.
So if you think that men don’t like strong women then think, purely humanly, if apart from your virtues you don’t have too many qualities that make you look like a woman that may be physically attractive, but also cold and repulsive.
2. Even the best features will not impress everyone
Let’s get one thing clear – intelligence is great! There is really nothing sexy about people who are devoid of ambition, personal goals beyond asking “What’s for dinner today?” And their cultural knowledge is limited to watching MTV.
In long-term relationships, we want to be (generally as people, not just men) with people with whom we are on an equal footing, who we have something to admire, who are going somewhere, and with whom we are able to build real closeness.
So if you have such features, then these are a few strong points that fit in with the ideal of a partner.
And now for something you don’t know – if you’re beautiful, every guy will love you. If you are beautiful internally, only those guys who have plans to be with you will do.
This is because men choose women differently when they want to be in a relationship with someone and when they only care about sex.
In the first case, they pay attention to everything. In the latter, only the looks and how much effort it will cost to get you to bed.
If a guy doesn’t care about anything else (and there are always plenty of men out there who don’t want a relationship at the moment) then the fact that you’re a “strong woman” at best won’t care. At worst, they consider it a disadvantage, because it’s easier to go to bed with a woman who you can easily impress.
Don’t take it as a reason to complain about a terrible world. Just accept that your resourcefulness is an asset, but only for guys who want to be with someone for more than three nights.
What to do with all of this?
For starters, stop treating your accomplishments or intelligence as flaws. The world no longer needs women who equate “love” and “sacrifice”. It doesn’t work for you, the guys, or the relationships in general.
However, don’t expect your legs to bend under every guy you meet. Instead, treat men’s reactions to your accomplishments or self-confidence as an indicator of
a) how they feel about themselves
b) whether they are oriented towards a long-term relationship.
Accept that if you get to know a guy and he is not interested in your goals, passions and achievements, it means that he is only interested in the triangle between your jointed thighs. He’s either that kind of guy or has a period in his life, but it’s not your job to make him realize he should want something else. Just go ahead.
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Remember that it doesn’t matter how many people you attract, but whether they are the right people. I guarantee you that if you are a woman who lives her life, but can also let someone into it, you will attract the best guys in the world.
Finally, I know that you can treat any of the sentences you read here as fairy tales and exclaim, “But there are no men around me who value strong women,” and I believe it. Except that your surroundings are not the whole world, and you will notice it if you only get to know people outside of your close circle.
What limits us the most is the way we think and the environment. Change it today. You will thank me later.